New Roads Are New Adventures
Life is full of road closures and detours, leading us to new and unknown journeys. Those new roads often lead to new adventures. Ones missed had we stayed on the road well-traveled.
Two years ago, today, we found ourselves on one of those new roads. I suffered a stroke. Due to the promptness of getting to the hospital, I was able to receive a drug that dissolved the blood clots and restored blood flow to my brain, lessening the damage done. Had my wife not been home at the time, I would have been there all day by myself. We can only speculate what might have happened.
My brain struggles to process all the activity around it. Sensory overload is my new normal. Full-time employment at a fast-paced law firm is no longer. These days I am fortunate to work part-time at a concrete contractor, where the owners and my coworkers are committed to keeping me from melting down. What once was an ability to multitask now sometimes finds it hard to simply “single-task.” Afternoon quiet time at home is a daily thing. Ear plugs and noise canceling headphones are often my best friends. Driving is limited to back and forth to work. Other than that, I am a passenger. I must say, my driver is stunningly beautiful.
In this new normal, most things take more time and more effort. And this new normal has also forced me re-evaluate what is and is not important, what is and is not healthy, what is and is not needed, what is and is not beneficial, and tweak my life, change up my daily rhythm, helping me to become a better and healthier version of me. More quiet time and abstract painting as art therapy are just two of the ways I find beneficial to settle the chaos in my brain.
In a writing I did last month on the need for helpers in life, I gave kudos to caregivers. They are often underappreciated. I want to again publicly thank my wife for her constant caregiving, always done so naturally, so gracefully, so selflessly, and with so much love. If you would like to read that post, click here.
For years I have taught, preached, and tried to live out the reality that “a faith not tested is a faith not trusted.” That reality has become ever so real and personal, as we walk out my (our) life changed by, but not defined by, the effects of a stroke. I did not this choose this path but am choosing to walk out this path trusting God. To be transparent and completely honest, I admit, some days it is a real struggle, both with getting through certain situations and holding on to faith, especially when my brain just does not want to cooperate. Sometimes woe is me creeps in.
While I have made tremendous strides in my recovery, I will likely continue to have some level of neurological deficits and cognitive challenges for the remainder of my life. Every day I need to celebrate every new step, no matter how small. Every day I need to ask God for His sustaining peace and protection over me, asking Him to walk with me. One of my go-to verses is found in Isaiah 26:3 – “You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.” And, similarly, in Psalm 112:7 I hold to these words – “He is not afraid of bad news; his heart is firm, trusting in the Lord.”
As you go about your day today, rejoice in the joys, celebrate the victories, and pick yourself up from the things that knock you down! Let the sun be rising not setting.
And, regardless of whether or not you have experienced a life-altering event, what changes might you need to make in your own life to put yourself on a path to becoming a better version of you? New roads often lead to new adventures. What are you waiting for?
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